I have a very silly boyfriend who makes every weekend awesome. Here he is hiding from the world because he had something in his teeth. A fate that each of us will succumb to at some time in our lives…*
*the stuff in our teeth…not the bag on our head…but if you are prone to putting a bag on your head, make it a paper one. It’s harder to suffocate. Continue Reading
Thanks to friend of the blog Charlee for sending in some crazy roommate stories. Today’s lesson, as she so eloquently stated, “Humans are a bunch of WEIRDOS!”
“I told a bossy college roommate that I could find the common room on my own for a meeting (she wanted me to miss the last 2 minutes of Sex & the City?! just to have her way.) and then she stopped all communication with me. This resulted in two months of absolute silence.”
Yep. It’s true.
I’ve even played it in my dreams. And even in my dreams, the game ended. Why oh why?
I need a support group for game addicts.
I’ve really been missing Becky lately. I don’t really have a best friend now. I mean Emily’s supposed to be my best friend but lately it hasn’t felt like it. I wish I could write the truth in here, but I can’t. Emily will read this. But right now I can’t keep my feelings in. So, Emily, don’t take offense by what I’m writing. I have to get my feelings of my chest.
One thing that made Becky’s and mine friendship so strong was that we were always fighting. We never had feelings to get off our chests and if we did, we could argue it out and no one would get offended. But if I ever have a problem with Emily and I get mad, emily will get really, really upset and start crying then and there! So, I can’t stay mad but am guilty. If she could hold her feelings in, it would be better. What our friendship really needs is a good fight. It’ll never work this way.
She’s to over something. She acts like a jealous boyfriend sometimes. To her if I happen to be talking to someone else, she’ll feel left out and start to pout. Every 2° if I’m in a good mood, Emily’ll be in a bad mood and bring me down with her. Excuse me, for being happy! I swear if I’m happy and she’s not (which she never is) I have to stop being happy. And there’s one thing she has to know: Alexis doesn’t like her! There, I wrote it! All the problems w/ her and Bio Science are because Alexis doesn’t like her! She hast o know that! I didn’t know how to tell her that but now, if she reads this she’ll know.
Every Mon. and Tues. Emily comes home w/ my carpool and my mom takes her home. Her house isn’t that out of the way, but why should my mom take routine trips out of her way just for her?!!! There are people who live much, much closer who she could easily get rides with. Take Erica! She lives 2 blocks away! Erica could easily give Emily a ride home, but no, she has to inconvenience my mom and me by having us waste gasoline on her! I know Elaine does a lot for me but my mom also takes Emily to ice skating once a week, a job she doesn’t particularly enjoy! Continue Reading
I fell in love with Pulp as an impressionable youth. The song Underwear appealed to my pubescent fantasies…and my flair for the dramatic. From there, the love affair only got stronger, as I explored the ins and outs of Jarvis’ clever lyrics, sex-obsessed dance songs, and melo-dramatic ballads. I’ve been in love ever since. The show last week was the realization of a long-time dream…to be in the same room…to dance as they played…to sing along on the top of my lungs…
The month before this show, I was frantic. Every Pulp album was on repeat. I sang Disco 2000 a cappella in the shower each morning. I contemplated marrying someone whose last name began with a “C” so I too could sing truthfully, “I’m not Jesus, but I have the same initials.”
Even as the concert approached, I couldn’t believe it was happening. To finally — after all these years — have Pulp reunite and tour!! And for my most awesome friend Jesse to throw me a ticket even after I couldn’t get one the day they went on sale!! Oooh, if I’m not the luckiest girl in the world.
Last Tuesday evening will be an evening I relive over and over. To ease this, I’m embedding videos for the songs they played in the correct order. Oh and here’s my best photo of Jarvis…a man I probably would despise getting involved with, but would anyway.
One of our favorite musicians, Levon Helm, passed away today at the age of 71. Made famous by the success of the The Band, Levon spent his later years battling throat cancer, to which he ultimately succumbed. Despite the hardship, he released multiple Grammy-winning albums in recent years.
These albums have been some of the best that we’ve added to our recent collection. Will has more thoughts on Levon’s life and accomplishments.
I leave you with one of my favorite of his recent songs. A sad one, because it is a sad time.
I’m excited to report that my request for insults has not gone unanswered!
“Nunya Business” from San Jose, CA, writes:
I met you at a few of the parties. You’re a crazy, soul destroying, manhood leeching, empty capsule of a human being’s capacity to be rational.
Granted, this was not a comment on the blog where I asked for insults, but on the one where I discussed our previous Roommate From Hell’s propensity for peeing on stuff.
So, it might be personal.
Regardless, let’s put it to the test. As I wrote the other day, I propose that all really good insults need to be…
Terrible
Haunting
Insulting
Nefarious
Katabolic
Assuming that this insult was meant for me, we can fairly assess its effectiveness.
Was this terrible? Well, it did make me feel pretty lousy. Except I’m pretty sure it’s from my ex Roommate From Hell, so you have to consider the source. Also, you can’t make an omelet without breaking any eggs. FYI.
Was this haunting? Nah. I’ve already forgotten it.
Insulting? Vaguely. “Empty capsule of a human being’s capacity to be rational.” What does this even mean? I don’t feel very empty. On closer look, I don’t think this makes sense. That makes me laugh. FAIL!
Nefarious? Reading your ex-roommate’s blog and posting insults? Nah. That’s child’s play.
Katabolic? Not at all. Thanks for the fodder for the blog, buddy.
Continue Reading
Even if you’re running out the door to the vet because your cat is acting really really strange and doesn’t want breakfast for the first time EVER and it’s the cup that you used yesterday so it’s pretty clean and you just really have to get out the door.
No. The coffee on top of a teabag makes the coffee taste like tea and then it’s neither coffee or tea. Getting to that appointment on time was not worth this suffering!!
Photo of what I wish I were drinking: a caffe latte from Subrosa.
Oh and Gus is okay but got into a little spat with some extremely misguided other cat. Grrr. Continue Reading
My coach introduced me to this awesome acronym to help you gage whether your input is worth sharing. Ask yourself, is this sentiment…
Timely
Helpful
Important
Necessary
Kind
When all five of those are satisfied, then you can be sure that you are being the best possible person you can be at that juncture. That’s all well and good and I’m sure good advice.
But I’d like to suggest that we THINK before we insult, as well. When you take the time to be mean, ask yourself, is this feedback…
Terrible
Haunting
Insulting
Nefarious
Katabolic
Only when all five are truly delivered, do you have a scorn worthy of leaving your lips.
I think we can all agree that a jab that is merely insulting but not haunting — a waste of breath! You want that person to remember what you said for all eternity.
Further, any derision that is up to par on nefarious (EVIL for those of you who didn’t do so well on the SATs), but falls down short on katabolic doesn’t do the job when it comes to breaking down your adversary. A truly worthy slander will leave the subject torn up and silent. You don’t want to risk a comeback, after all!
Let’s see how this system works by taking as an example, the offense I delivered to Roommate from Hell the other day…
“I hope your new place is as slovenly as you’d hoped this one would be.”
Was this…
Terrible? I suppose it was a little bit, but I wouldn’t say it was that bad.
Haunting? I’d like to think so, but I bet it wasn’t.
Insulting? Yes, I do think I hit this nail on the head.
Nefarious? Meh. I give me a C+ on nefarious.
Katabolic? FAIL.
Let’s consider as an alternate example, one that an associate thought up…
“Did you move back home with Mommy and Daddy so they could clean up after you?”
If this had been said, would it have been…
Terrible? YES.
Haunting? Oh the truth! Oh the childhood associations!! YES!
Insulting? Oh yes!
Nefarious? Delivered in the right tone, I’d say so!
Katabolic? This might depend on the recipient…if he had a particularly harsh childhood, this one could really, really cut to the core. Worth a try, I’d say.
Yes, I do think this system works. What do you think? Continue Reading
