I am a mom, entrepreneur, occasional blogger, and creator. I recently launched Here Comes the Apocalypse, a self-paced disaster preparedness system with a dark sense of humor. My team and I make up Artsy Geek, a top-ranked Bay Area branding and digital agency.
You have stumbled on my little corner of the internet. Thanks for coming by.
you just have to wonder if some of your very tenants of being might be wrong.
For instance:
One of my essential tenents of being:
Write all blog posts late at night…
whenever the tongue loose enough…
and the fingers limber.
& never, ever delete them.
you’re at a friend’s party.
you see someone.
you notice someone.
their eyes,
their hair.
you can’t avoid noticing:
their wit,
style
somewhere along…
they become more than wit and style wrapped up in an acceptably attractive package.
They are a person,
but then.
when the physical world ceases to deliver,
one may perpetuate
as an entry in your address book
and it’s completely amazing how much drama one can glean from a text message or two if one wants to.
Yet, even still, there’s something just delicious about doing whatever you want.
and I mean “laid up” in the most dramatic sense…And what a relief that is! Not to have to fake it anymore. What a gift the universe had bestowed…a copy of Justin Timberlake’s latest and intense perpetual back pain!
I avoided everything for the week or so. I could only minimally work (my top priority), and most of what I did was from the comfort of my bed. I couldn’t avoid my many meetings, but I did manager to remain horizontal for the length of one. Until I almost fell asleep.
Today it was referenced–to the Board of Directors–that I would keep my job for long after five years had passed. I raised my arms as if in shackles.
And with that sentence, I realize I need a live journal.
My chiropractor asked me today if I was happy. I found the question awfully surprising.
Lately I’ve taken to being honest with those health professionals whose services I solicit. I used to lie. Today I wrote down the honest .25 packs of cigarettes a day on the questionnaire.
I avoided it. “I’ve been stressed out, lately.”
I’m still surprised hours later. This chiropractor has the face of one of my least favorite father figures in my life (nameless here). He isn’t creepy though, and he isn’t mean. He called me after my appointment to check on me. How sweet is that?
And where was I going?
My Christmas gifts shall be belts and ties.
I have renewed my love for Mariah Carey.
Oooh, Mariah. What have I done without you all these years?!
my cat is meowing hungrily at the door, anxious to see the outdoors once again.
I’ve tried and tried to explain that he never will again,
but all he is is bewildered and mad at me.
🙁
I have this really elaborate task list. Google hasn’t come through with googletasks, so I had to create my own.
I think I’m onto something here. I think I could sell this. It’s Get Rich Quick Scheme #352, are you ready?
This task list will get you soooo organized. It has a table of contents at the top, and all items are hyperlinked to a more detailed section below. There’s a link to the top from every subsection. View it in normal view if you’re using Word. OpenOffice…use the web view.
Items that need action are blue; items in need of immediate action are red; items are larger in size the more urgent they are. Of course, that’s just the schema that I find relevant. You can choose any style or color of text to represent what ever is salient in your life! For awhile I was underlining sections that required me to consult with someone else. It’s a word document after all. Or html. Whatever you like.
I have one of these for work, and one for real life. I tell you, I’ve never been more organized.
The real life one, titled andthentherewas, is filled with all sorts of detail… I have subsections for each Get Rich Quick Scheme (only one main one currently–it’s a doosie!! (Oh man. I can’t wait for my new car. First thing I’m buying. And then I’m going to start a collection of prints by little-known artists from the Benelux region. Totally.)).
Update: I just added a to buy category. Divided it into immediate and longer term for increased usability. And added Ernst and Tanguy (not from the Benelux region, duh))). My subsection for textiles is now divided into maintenance, immediate, Queso (my knitting machine…just named him?! What do you think?), to felt, and other. I’m looking forward to those felted wool chokers. They’re going to be hotttt.
But my main problem isn’t really how to market this… I actually realize that it’s probably not going to make me any money. It requires waaaay too much work on the part of the user. And it’s just a digital document. Anyone could make one. I should write a book, and we know that books don’t make any money. (Which makes this more accurately Never Going To Happen Scheme #31,984.)
But that’s not my problem. My problem is the damn task list. See, I just started this one for my home life–I keep a lot of shit in my head, and I need to dump it into some document or system somewhere if I’m ever to get any rest.
That’s my reasoning. And here’s my problem (at long last):
If I turn off my laptop, I’m more likely to not open it up again while I try to go to sleep. But if I can’t update andthentherewas, then how do I ever purge all the fantastic ideas I get while I go to sleep?!! Like last night, it was the vision of a fish tank of guppies and philodendrons sprawling out across the shelf and up the wall that kept me awake. Such a natural combination of plant and amphibians*, I don’t know why everyone doesn’t do this. And my cat will love it. I used to have a fish when I had him back in Cloyne Court**, and his favorite activity was getting to the fish. He’d stick his paw in the tank, take it out, give it a perplexed look, and repeat. So funny!! How can you sleep with memories like these?!***
So my falling to sleep hours are filled with fantastic ideas, but their onset requires me to turn off the computer.
Newsflash: I just added a songs to karaoke subsection to andthentherewas. Safety Dance. Oooh baby. I think I can actually sing this one.
This list is getting longer and longer. I suppose I’ll just always keep my laptop on. And carry the document around on (in?) one of those little keychain memory devices. I have two. And I’ll accept that in actuality, most of what makes it on there Never Going to Happen Schemes.
*What are fish anyway?
**Name-dropped Cloyne here so my blog will set off my google alert for Cloyne Court, FYI. I’m totally that much of a nerd.
***Dude, my cat just moved in, and I am soooo happy. I’ve never been so happy, seriously. He’s asleep on my knee right now as I spend way too much time on a way too detailed blog entry that no one will have the patience (or humor, admittedly) for. And he’s purring!! I had been so afraid that he wouldn’t like it here cause he can’t go in the back yard like he used to, but he adjusted after like an hour, and he’s purred ever since. He’s the most wonderful and loving cat before, and I am the luckiest girl in the world.
from this nonprofit I send money to. I like to think of it like I’m sending money straight to my adopted daughter in Vietnam, but I know it’s not really like that.
I sent her some colored pencils and a coloring book for her birthday. That wasn’t what the card was about though.
It’s been one year since I began supporting Nguyen. My thirty dollars a month makes so much available in her life.
That’s me. Philanthropic.
That’s me. Self-indulgent.
I had a conversation today about the nature of personality. It was my most favorite conversation today. And I had some doosies.
(How does one spell “doosies”? I’ve never known.)
Are we each a unique bundle of characteristics? Isn’t that what makes us each who we are? But if so, how many can change and yet can we still be the same?
And if not characteristics, then cells? No, cells are replaced in time. We are what we eat, and we grow out of our transient nutrients. The body is such a wonderfully dependable system.
Is the personality such a wonderfully dependable system?
Today, I’m freaking out. A week ago, I was ecstatic. Complete.
How funny how time goes.
In my cult the other day, we wrote down what we know about ourselves. For instance, I wrote, “I like to drink in airport bars and I abandoned my cat.” And so on for a half page or so.
Presumably, when I get my cat from my mom and dad’s on Friday, that particular characteristic will cease to be true.
But I’ll still be me.
I’m still me even though I freak out sometimes.
Isn’t the nature of a decision a limitation on the world? In which case, wouldn’t we be better off had we never decided to be a certain way? Or is it too intrinsic to the nature of dna that we should decide?
What is a decision anyway?
It all depends on your context, your world.
And my world is tired.
we have to talk about something.
I feel like, sometimes, you judge me. Yep, it’s true. I feel like, if I don’t write on you enough, you start to emit these really hateful vibes. Like, who are you, to think you can keep a blog alive and then watch as it barely even changes on a MONTH TO MONTH basis?!! What kind of mother will you be?!!!!! Would you want to live like that?!! Have some compassion, you HO!
Well, look blog. I’ve been cheating on you. I’ve been toying with various open source software options, and installing plugins to FireFox. I’m even considering installing Linux. And, of course, there’s mySpace. Ohhhh, my beloved mySpace.
Now, I know that we can all get along and you’re down with polyamory and all, but…
To be straight, you’re just not that high of a priority. Do you even know how slow I am at answering email? Let alone phone calls?!!
And you’re a little too public. I’m going to run for civic office one day, you know. We have to be realistic about things. I don’t think this is going to work out.
Unless, maybe, if we made you a wiki, and then I might never be ultimately responsible for your content?
Worth some follow up thinking, I’d say. Your thoughts, blog?
you have a hard weekend.
Sometimes, you have to face what you didn’t know you had to face.
More to come.
