Everyone in this cliche is always dancing w/ someone else in the cliche. It bothers me cause I want to be part of that cliche so bad I could die!

I hate school dances. I’m crying. The only guy I danced with was Jeff M. Alexis broke up with him today so it was okay. Ana asked him to dance with me. He was outside drinking when the song started, so we didn’t dance the whole song through. While we were dancing he asked,
How may people have you danced with?” Me: “Just you.” “What about the other dances?”

“Two guys in the sixth grade dance last time.”

“Why don’t you ask someone?”

“I don’t know.”

“I ask people I don’t even know!”

“Aren’t you afraid they’ll say no?”

“Noone’s said no yet”

“Oh” That made me feel really bad. Continue Reading

You will never believe what happened! I ran 3 laps w/out stopping!

You will never believe what happened! I ran 3 laps w/out stopping! I’ve never ran 2 let alone 3! Then I got to play basketball. I <3 PE! Except for one thing. Now that Emily and Alexis are out of PE, I get to hang around with Jessica, Christy and their new friend Nikki! Annoyance city! Jessica ad Christy are paying more attention to Nikki than to me! I hate being ignored!0

Tamara is having a party Saturday night and I’m not invited. I don’t exactly feel hurt, but… Emily says Tamara was only allowed to invite a limited amount of people, but still…

Alexis says she doesn’t want to go out with Jeff anymore but she doesnt want to dump him. Oh, well! Tomorrow I get to wear my costume to school. I <3 Halloween Tomorrow night I have the dance, and I still don’t know what to wear! C’est la vie! (I don’t care, Emily)

Toodaloo

Such a sunny send off complete with ridiculous smiley faces. I was 12, after all.

Myron.com. Sounds like moron.com, appropriately enough.

I received a stuffed envelope addressed to “MS. Jenniffer Heller” in the mail last week. Ms. Jenniffer Heller of “Artsy Greek Designs.”

OK, so it’s a promotional letter from some people who managed to get both the spelling of my first name and the name of my company wrong. It’s not the first time it’s happened, though it is the first time I’ve caught wind of “Artsy Greek.” Normally it’s “Artsy Geeky” or some such.

I open up the package and double over with laughter.

“Dear Ms. Heller,”

Yes!  They got that part right!

“Surprised to see the Artsy Greek Designs name on the enclosed Regatta Horizons Duo Diary sample?  Looks impressive, does it?”

I inspected the sample more closely.

Wait, that's not our name or our phone number!

I was definitely impressed.  The letter went on…

“Why just send a pocket calendar when you can make a really big impression?  The Duo Diary is two gifts in one – a pocket calendar and notepad.”

The question they didn’t address that’s worth asking…why send a pocket calendar at all??

But, you know, these pocket calendars are printed with erroneous information in gold.  I do like gold.

I received this letter dated "August 2011" with its limited time offer in October.

Only $1.99 each??  What a steal.  What do you think?  Essential tax-deductible purchase or the most essential tax-deductible purchase ever??

The day before yesterday Billy asked Kelly H. out and she said, “Kiss my ass!”

On Sun. Alexis, Jeff, Billy, and I were going to get together, right? Now, there’s a change in the plans. Billy is going to ask someone out so it will probably be a double date. The new plans don’t include me! What if Billy is going to ask me out? I don’t consider him more than a friend. The day before yesterday Billy asked Kelly H. out and she said, “Kiss my ass!” What a rejection. Billy’s been really upset. He can’t take another rejection! I can’t say no and I can’t say yes! What am I supposed to do? I am not interested in him at all romantically! He’s just a friend.

Later on…

Great news! Well, depends who you are. For Natalie, yes. Billy asked her out! O.K. news for me. Now I don’t have to worry about what to say, but it’s just another rejection. What does that make it the tenth? I can’t stop liking Andrew C. til I find someone else to like. But who?

What’s wrong with me? Is Alexis always going to get the guys? Am I going to have to go til High school without even being asked out? Well I’ve been asked out twice. But they were jokes. Again I ask, What’s Wrong with me? Last week Erica said to me, “plenty of guys like you.” If that’s so how come they don’t show it. I must attract all the shy ones. Rejected again!

Damn!

10/26

Bien news. For Alexis. Ana liked Jeff M. and so did Alexis. Now Jeff and Alexis are going out! And I got to ask him out for her. My social life is whack though. Nothing’s ever going to happen. Emily thinks Mike H. and I make a cute couple. I remember when he stole my inhaler and broke my pig pen. He paid $5 for the pen. The point is he might have used to like me. Emily keeps bringing the entry for 10-8. I can’t like him though. We’re just friends.

I doubt anything’s going to happen at the Halloween Dance. It’ll probably end up like the last one, my crying all through the evening.

Ana is really upset that Alexis and Jeff are going together. She was crying at lunch. I’m so happy! She deserves it.

I'm ashamed by how awful I was. Girls can be so mean.

I really hate Daniele. I mean she’s nice and all, but ever since the last dance, I haven’t been friends w/ her. She said, “Hey, Jen it’s no fun if you’re not dancing!” I know she didn’t mean to be mean, but it made me cry harder (after the dance). How is she supposed to know what I feel like? She has every guy in the school around her little finger.

The Art of Online Portraiture

My dad saved me this article on “The Art of Online Portraiture” in social media from the Wall Street Journal the other day. He clipped it out and sent it with my sister when she came to visit last Thursday. Do you realize that in fifty years no one will ever think of clipping something out of the newspaper? That perhaps there won’t be newspapers at all??

Anyway, this article (which you can read here in the Wall Street Journal online) is about how important your photos are to your social media presence. Especially when using social media professionally as we all ought to. The right picture strikes the right one, the article advises.

I read through it bragging inwardly about how awesome and professional my photo is. Even if it doesn’t capture me in action working at the computer or walking down the street as the article suggests one ought. I recognized that was pretty good advice, but still was feeling mighty good about this shot littering the internet:

And then I remembered how just last week I sent professional messages to potential attendees of my E-commerce seminar from my Facebook account.

With this as my profile pic:

Dammit. No wonder they didn’t come.