I'm so slow,

Posted on by Jennifer Heller

but I’m with it now.

The transformation began when I discovered youtube the other day.

It perfectly complements the hour or so per day I listen to the radio. I’ve been trying to listen to stations other than Kiss FM lately. It was time. Anyway, whenever I hear a song I like, I google the lyrics, find out who sings it and then go straight to youtube and watch the videos. If I like the song enough, I’ll play it in the background ad infinitum while I work. Meera loves that.*

If the new song stands up to the youtube test, I may even go so far as to get out my utorrent and download it. Now, I hadn’t downloaded a song since 9/11**. I’ve been listening to the same shit ever since. And Kiss FM. And some $1 cassettes from garage sales. I have a helluva discriminating ear, I tell you.

Then I borrowed an iPod shuffle from Sue for EuroTrip 07. I put those mp3s I had downloaded from those new radio stations I had to try cause Alex hates Kiss FM on that iPod shuffle and woah.

So, the point is that I finally heard the Postal Service. Again and again. I can finally understand what people are talking about at parties.

Phew. That was a close one.

*but screw her cause she quit.
**that was the date that whole Napster scare happened, wasn’t it?!

my flailing tupperware business

Posted on by Jennifer Heller

somehow doesn’t matter.

my website has the March specials….though they are thankfully not labeled as such.

I haven’t had a Tupperware party yet this year.

Not one person who leaves me a message neglects to tell me that my voicemail still advertises the value of the 40% off April Gift Sets. What a value those were!!

And this, Tupperware’s birthday month. A month jam packed with specials.

Maybe I’m not meant to earn thousand(s) of dollars a month working just four hours a week!

Maybe I’m just a Tupperware fan, and not a Tupperware lady.

Or maybe I just have a life, and a sufficient enough income.

I’m boring.

Please accept my apologies.

but it's okay cause Alex picked up some curl creme at Walgreens today.

Posted on by Jennifer Heller

I left my wallet at Beckett’s the other night. Three days later, I left my watch at the security check point at the courthouse. I looked into the eyes of that security guard, and I solemnly pledged, as I had to the bar proprietor, “I have learned my lesson.”

Some lessons are so easy.

Some are so hard. Like keeping the toothpaste on the toothbrush. You have to keep the toothbrush vertical. I can’t seem to get that down. Today not only did I lose my first blob of toothpaste but the second glob fell out of my mouth into the bathroom sink!

Research is key, kids. Research is key.

Life==research? if so, then necessarily true?

I thought the Matrix was a good movie. I liked the idea of us living in a virtual reality. I’ve thought for awhile that if only I’d go into retirement homes–posh–that’d be the ticket. You know the key there is virtual reality. And drugs.*

And why, oh why, do we capitalize the word Internet? It’s like some freaky foreshadowing of this future where we live in a digital world.

right, okay, it’s been a long day.

*looking for investors!!