Lauren’s Awful Roommate

Friend of the blog Lauren recounts her worst roommate situation.

A Cat with 50% Accuracy Meets His Match

“I had to move out of the house I loved because my roommate decided to move in his girlfriend and her cat. The problem was we already had a cat with 50% litterbox accuracy.

“My roommate who owned the cat (the same one who decided to move in his gf) decided that instead of cleaning litter boxes more frequently he would just buy more litter boxes. When he did get around to cleaning these boxes he would often leave bags of cat shit sitting in the house. During the summer things really reeked. The thought of having another cat was too much to handle.

“When I raised my concerns, he pointed it out he was the primary lease holder. Dick. Then the girlfriend moves in, she puts all her shit in the living room, not just suit cases but mannequins and sewing machines. It was particularly creepy when I would go downstairs half asleep to see a bunch of mannequins in the living room.

“The first few days I didn’t say anything about the piles of shit in the living room. When I finally moved all her shit to one spot in the living room she said “thank you”. Not “thank you I’ll really need to clean this up right?”.

“After a week I wrote a nice email saying we needed to find a place to store all her shit, offering suggestions and how to get rid of stuff in the common downstairs closet. Her boyfriend and I spent about two hours putting her shit away as she sat there.

“Then the unholy messes left in the kitchen began. The cats were constantly fighting and hair rolled through the house like so many tumbleweeds.

“Her cat would use a litterbox but would constantly barf. I wrote nice emails, I cleaned up after her, her cat was very sweet and lived in my room. I suggested we buy a roomba.

“I loved this house and this person wasn’t going to win. The final straw came when the $100 knife I got for Christmas that I hid in the kitchen was left out dirty. I realized I could never have nice things here, that my house would always smell like cat shit, that no matter how many emails sent this girl was incredibly clueless when it came to living with other people.

“My other roommates and I talked of mutiny but it the end I just decided it would be easier to move out.”

You’re lucky to have made it out arrive!! Sounds like breathing that air could have been a health risk.

Share your terrible roommate story in the comments or email me at! We’re running out, and if we’re going to keep this roommate arch going, I need some new material.

Also, why do so many horrible roommate stories have to do with cats?

Gross story, or grossest story ever??

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