seriously, yo

I recently regained possession of my journal spanning from October 8, 1995 through February 19, 1996. This is the first entry of said journal (verbatum):

Sunday 10/8/95

Hello! Well, assuming you’ve read my last diary, I basically left in a whirl of emotions. Never mind. Well in the past five or so days, so many things have changed, but yet no one can accept the differentces, and everyone is living their life as expected. no one really talked about the changes. Except for me and Katie. I think we are the most aware of everything that has happened, probably since we are the main changes. Anyways, I guess I should talk about the changes I’ve been blabbering on about this entire page.

Well, after Tuesday, I had basically decided that my life wasn’t mine, but that I’ll deal with it, grin and bear it. I’d do what was expected and hope that everything went away. Katie and I walked with everyone else to school, but broke off so we could drop off our stuff. We went around greeting people, but soon we were with the skaters. I don’t really know them and didn’t feel right. I saw Erika, Emily and Fred, decided that anything was better than this and went to say hello. Then I decided that I needed to talk to Humphrey and get some advice. Fred came with me and asked me what was the matter. Well, knowing that she was one of the ones pissed off at me, I decided that it didn’t matter and just kinda told her that I knew what’s been goign on in their minds and how if I don’t eat with them I can’t be their friends. She said that that wasn’t true. Humphrey didn’t tell me much but to follow my heart. Katie told me to do what I wanted, not what she wanted, not what Emily wanted, but what I wanted. So I did. At lunch, I went to Humphrey. I sat down, ate my lunch and chatted with the Humphrey-goers. Basically, I ate lunch with them,. As soon as I was finished, though, I upped and left. Away to the parking lot I went with Alyssia, Ana and Katie. Ahhhh, the smell of cigarettes. Ana’s matches were failing, so Jeff (a senior) came over with a lighter. Alyssia lit it and took an inhale and offered it to me. Soon after, with all eyes, including Jeff’s (he wouldn’t leave), I smoked my first cigarette. It was ok. Not really disgusting at all. Katie was actually tempted. But she didn’t. I was really glad. I finally did it. In History, Emily and Erika ignored the fact that I left with Alyssia at lunch. Jason helped my breath with some tic tacs. The next day, we went at lunch, but couldn’t get the necessary fire. After school, Steve and Jeff gave me and Alyssia rides home, unfortunately, Alyssia was dropped off first which made things a little uncomfortable, considering I had just met them the day before. But it was ok. Oh Friday, I went over to Katie’s after school and then we went to Lyon’s for dinner with Bryan and Mike. Bryan stabbed himself with a toothpick. It was really enjoyable. They are the coolest. We walked over to Blockbuster and discovered where Jeff works. Amusing huh? On Saturday, Katie and I went to a soccer game, Dave’s team against Zach’s. Mike’s on Zach’s team. Zach’s team won. I enjoyed it. There were some nice-looking guys on Dave’s team. I didn’t enjoy seeing Dave again. But that’s ok. That night Natalie and I spent the night at Katie’s and rented Billy Madison. From Blockbuster. Katie went to get it but he was there. Never mind. Anyway, that was fun. This morning, I went to Katie’s soccer game and then out to Friday’s and to the mall. It was Bryan’s birthday (15!) and we were goign to take him somewhere but he couldn’t. We bought hair dye, and I dyed mine this evening. Blue. It’s not noticable at all, but I tried. I thought it would be incredibly bright. I don’t know if Katie did hers (green) or not. Anyways, time for bed.

–Susie J.

Holla

0 thoughts on “seriously, yo

  1. I must admit that I had foolishly assumed that for you to delay my sleep schedule to pound on your keyboard (by the way, did its marketing materials note its outlandishly loud spacebar?), you must have had a truly pressing bit of typing to attend to. I imagined a love letter, a death threat, a note to your attorney concerning your recent conviction of tax evasion. When I realized this morning that you had been merely copying an entry from your high school journal — well, I decided that that was pressing enough.

  2. I must admit that I had foolishly assumed that for you to delay my sleep schedule to pound on your keyboard (by the way, did its marketing materials note its outlandishly loud spacebar?), you must have had a truly pressing bit of typing to attend to. I imagined a love letter, a death threat, a note to your attorney concerning your recent conviction of tax evasion. When I realized this morning that you had been merely copying an entry from your high school journal — well, I decided that that was pressing enough.

  3. Oh wow, I just can’t stop laughing. Imagine my surprise when I make a random visit to your blog out of boredom, and upon scrolling down the page, see my name. I TOTALLY remember giving you your first cigarette, too, although I don’t remember much else from that time. Wasn’t that shortly after our first homecoming dance (I think we had been out at dinner beforehand when you mentioned for the first time that you wanted to try smoking)? I always was your corrupter – I’m not sure if that’s an actual word, but it is now. I don’t remember half the people mentioned in that entry (though after a while I realized “Alyssia” was not, in fact, Alyssia Jones, but Alicia, the girl from Thousand Oaks.) It did bring to mind, though, the first time we did ‘shrooms. I’d love to read THAT diary entry.

    Thanks so much for the blast from the past (though I can hardly believe that was 10 years ago.)

  4. Oh wow, I just can’t stop laughing. Imagine my surprise when I make a random visit to your blog out of boredom, and upon scrolling down the page, see my name. I TOTALLY remember giving you your first cigarette, too, although I don’t remember much else from that time. Wasn’t that shortly after our first homecoming dance (I think we had been out at dinner beforehand when you mentioned for the first time that you wanted to try smoking)? I always was your corrupter – I’m not sure if that’s an actual word, but it is now. I don’t remember half the people mentioned in that entry (though after a while I realized “Alyssia” was not, in fact, Alyssia Jones, but Alicia, the girl from Thousand Oaks.) It did bring to mind, though, the first time we did ‘shrooms. I’d love to read THAT diary entry.

    Thanks so much for the blast from the past (though I can hardly believe that was 10 years ago.)

  5. OMG, if I wasn’t on the road, I’d post that entry right now. That entry is “the definitive diary entry.” It’s the reason that my dairy resurfaced in the first place. I remember the time that you were smoking and waved at my mom and I in the car. That was pretty funny, especially when we were in high school. My mom’s seen me smoke plenty of cigarettes since!

  6. OMG, if I wasn’t on the road, I’d post that entry right now. That entry is “the definitive diary entry.” It’s the reason that my dairy resurfaced in the first place. I remember the time that you were smoking and waved at my mom and I in the car. That was pretty funny, especially when we were in high school. My mom’s seen me smoke plenty of cigarettes since!

  7. Hehe I TOTALLY don’t remember the waving/smoking incident. Then again, I apparently don’t remember much more than very vague ideas of high school. That’s what I get for being a pothead back then.

    So where are you on the road to?

  8. Hehe I TOTALLY don’t remember the waving/smoking incident. Then again, I apparently don’t remember much more than very vague ideas of high school. That’s what I get for being a pothead back then.

    So where are you on the road to?

  9. Oh, by the way, I remembered to come back and check for a comment cause I just woke up from a dream you were in. I was hanging out with you, a friend of mine from GA, and Andy Halseth. I think it was supposed to be one of my goodbye parties, but that makes no sense, since my family was also there, meaning that all but one person attending already lives in CA, so I must have already moved. Oh well, it was a dream, those never make sense. You shared your chicken wings with me, though.

  10. Oh, by the way, I remembered to come back and check for a comment cause I just woke up from a dream you were in. I was hanging out with you, a friend of mine from GA, and Andy Halseth. I think it was supposed to be one of my goodbye parties, but that makes no sense, since my family was also there, meaning that all but one person attending already lives in CA, so I must have already moved. Oh well, it was a dream, those never make sense. You shared your chicken wings with me, though.

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