Here was my reasoning:

The Nail Jazz booth was always happening during the last fair. Happening!! It’d be eleven thirty and the whole place would be empty except for the female purses opening in front of the three to five girls who had just drawn a dot flower in nail polish on an unsuspecting forefinger. And the smiles on their faces!!

No one comes to the fair looking for sponges. But everyone wants a set of Nail Jazz!!

When I started randomly bitching about the sponges to the Nail Jazz manager and she offered me a job, I figured it was fate. She had bought some sponges from me earlier that week.

Little did I know that the Solano County Fair, for which the Nail Jazz booth was destined, was on that infamous list titled “Worst Fairs in the Country.”

And so I spent my brief interleave between fairs day dreaming. I imagined all the smiles I would bring to little girls and widows and every woman in between by offering them the chance to draw little polish flowers* on their nails in the comfort of their own home. And even if they didn’t buy a set–how wonderful that they have a nail polish flower to remember us by!

The sponges wouldn’t let me sleep, however; they invaded my dreams in apparent retribution for the upcoming betrayal–or, perhaps, in warning. But heed no warning did I! I faithfully attended the first weekend of the Solano County Fair. I made an even hundred dollars, a modest wage. It works out to about $3.33 an hour–tax free! I’m working for Canadians. One of the only perks.

Everyone in Solano County gets their nails done. Either that or they just got their fake nails taken off and they’re ashamed of their nails. Either way, no one actually wants a nail polish flower demo, let alone a set of nail polish pens. Except for those little brats in the next booth over. They’re always hanging around and I’ll go and give them a happy face right when some potential money walks by!! Bollucks.

It turns out that the little dotted polish flower is not that easy. It’s a circle of five dots, but sometimes six, and sometimes two combine so there’s four. Those are some sad looking flowers, and a lady definitely doesn’t buy a set if she’s looking at a lopsided flower.

Last year the Solano County Fair was plagued by car bombings and shootings. What a riot!

Or a rot. Three vendors had packed up and left by the fifth day. No one’s making any money this year, either.

It has been a hard lesson. But I needed to learn first hand just how precarious this business is. My next gig should be better. I’m kinda nervous, though. I’m supposed to sell blue sponges. Blue sponges! The bright side: they won’t look like cheese.

*And other designs! Your imagination is the limit!

Speak up peeps.

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