The problem with selling sponges

Is that there’s competition.

Now, I know, what could possibly challenge the Super Sponge? Especially considering its infinite virtues. But it’s out there. And it’s in my building.

It’s called the Super Chamois. And it’s a “Miracle Cloth from Europe”.

I hate that shit.

It’s not bacteria, mildew and mold resistant! It doesn’t clean! All it does is soak shit out of the carpet (like the Super Sponge) and it is admittedly quite useful when it comes to drying sweaters.

Just roll the wet sweater in a damp one and let it sit. Cuts the sweater drying time in half. (Or something like that.)

Yesterday, I spent at least seven minutes extolling the virtues of the Super Sponge Set to a family of four. They were really impressed, but they didn’t want to have to carry it around so they promised to come back later.

They promised! Oh, I’m not naïve. I understand that most promises are empty. And one really does learn to deal with rejection in this business. But betrayal?!

Minutes later they had apparently made it all the way across the building—through a veritable web of sales people, mind you. I unfortunately chose that moment to take a leak, and witnessed the same family of four handing over their hard-earned cash to the damn Chamois Guy.

They bought the Super Chamois! They carried it around for the rest of the day! Didn’t they understand it doesn’t have half the virtues the super sponge does?!

Of course it doesn’t dry rock hard. That’s a good point, actually.

It’s nice how time lends perspective to things. I was pretty upset about this yesterday.


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