g. could be there for all our nightime adventures.

Last night we went to a halloween party sponsored by the USCA. I insisted on riding the Haunted House ride over and over again. Due to the extreme shortage in booze, we decided to head out, but not until after I had gotten in a powdered sugar fight with some other friends. Now I really looked like a ghost!!

“G., please, let’s go get our pictures taken at one of those picture booths. You know, the kind with the vertical line of four pictures. We’ve never taken one of those kinds of pictures.”

“They’re five bucks!”

“It’s okay, I’ll pay.”

So we head down towards the picture booths. We decide to take the precarious rope bridge. And it was precarious; I fell down right at the get go, but luckily didn’t fall the five flights of stairs to the bottom. In fact neither of took another tumble until we were nearly there and there was a lovely air mattress awaiting our fall. Not that it was really that comfortable of a landing. My jaw snapped, and I felt the reverberations through my bones.

I saw a wheezing six year old with a walker.

…drunk or not, I’m an asshole.

probably right. I have been crazy for a year.

Kelly Clarkson cancelled her show at the fair this evening. I don’t even know who she is, but I know this–she brings in the people. A good rule of thumb: It’s always a good night for sales when Kelly Clarkson plays.

Did she consider how her cancelling might affect, me, the vendor, and my livelihood? No, I’m sure not. Nor did she consider the hundreds of other vendors who were looking forward to the splashes of money from the flood of her presence.

It was around seven thirty and sales weren’t that bad, even considering Kelly’s unexcused absence. I was turning over the new shipment of the Dino set with a vengence. Everyone likes the Dino set. It comes with more bridges than the other two sets.

And then I got a return. A toothless man in one of those rent-a-wheel-chairs sped up to the booth. I hate rent-a-wheel-chairs. “My daughter’s set didn’t have any cars in it. It looked like it had been opened.”

Hmm… I was about to hand him a couple demo cars, but I don’t have that many. I asked if she could bring it back.

A couple minutes later a young mother appeared. She admitted to having been too afraid to come up and complain herself. Too afraid!! To complain to me?! We were instantly friends as we went through her set together. It was true! Her set only contained one car, not the two I had personally pledged came in every set. Her husband was pissed; she wasn’t to return without another car.

I took back the set. I got a different one. We opened it, just to be sure. One car! I cursed the wholesalers that were sending us incomplete sets! My breath was short, but I got it together and gave her a demo car.

At this point I must have sold at least twenty-five of these new Dino sets. That’s twenty-five families that I assured would have two cars that will only have one. It’s one of my main selling points–that two car bit. Twenty-five families angry with me this afternoon–this evening–tomorrow after school–Christmas morning!! The kids, their wails and drooping smiles. The parents–oh, how they will they curse!!

I’m seriously fearing for my karma.

the best selling set of toy cars…

…has this headline dancing along the back of the box:

LET TEAR AWAY IN YOU FANCY DRIVEWAYTHE FOND DRIVEWAY DOING YOUSELF

seriously.