television

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Countdown to Mad Men

January 27, 2012

I’ve been obsessed with Mad Men since my mom and her sisters got in a big fight about why her sisters wouldn’t watch it in October of 2010. See, my mom was a working lady in that era much like Peggy, and she took offense at the fact that her sisters didn’t like the show. They got it sorted out eventually and then all of us sat down to watch an episode.

I came home and spent the next two weeks doing nothing but watching every Mad Men episode there was. Since then, Mad Men has caused us to get cable (grrr…Comcast) and many a discussion about Don, Peggy, Pete, Roger…

In fact, when our downstairs neighbors moved and we got a Pete in their place we made jokes about keeping him away from our non-existent nanny. Oh yeah, we’re hilarious.

Like so many of my fellow Mad Men fans, I’ve been riding the stages of grief over the fact that AMC has taken the better part of two years getting the new season going. What’s up with that??

Well, AMC FINALLY announced the date of the premiere of Season 5.  To commemorate this occasion (and anxiously wait for it), I — with the help of my most favorite graphic designer Lindsay and the web development skillz of my web shop, Artsy Geek — created Countdown to Mad Men, the second-to-second update about how long we have to wait for our next fix.

So, join me at CountdowntoMadMen.com and let’s wait with baited breath for the return of our favorite drunks, chauvinists and philanderers.  And if you like it, help me spread the word.  We all need something to look forward to. it’s hot, right? And useful too, right?

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May 19

May 19, 2011

I feel so depressed.  I don’t know why.  It just sprang up on me.

Suddenly, in the middle of 90210, I started loving Smudge so much.  I started bawling and saying how much I loved her and how she couldn’t be given away.

Then (after I composed myself) I went out on the balcony. Suddenly I loved Pleasanton + the town homes. I tried to convince Mom + Dad not to move, but it didn’t work.  At least now we may not give Smudge for awhile.

I don’t know.  90210 was so sad.  It seems like I’m living in their saga.

I’m tired.  Bye!

Smudge looked something like this.

Has your love for your cats ever made you cry?

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Oh the joy Twitter can bring!

May 3, 2011

I was just super stoked to check my email and find that somehow, somewhere, during the night Thaao Phenglis followed me (ME!) on Twitter.

This is the man who played Tony and Andre (often in the same scene) on Days of Our Lives. I loved his elegance, his mystery, and his perfect combination of good and evil. The sexy accent was an added plus.

When Tony and estranged brother John Black made up underneath a sinking ship it changed my life. No longer did I fight with my little sister over things so dumb as who’s turn it was to do the dishes. If Tony and John Black can be on good terms, so can me and my sister!

Who enters a room on a horse! Tony does! And Thaao too, obviously.

That’s a fact. Read on…

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televisions, browsers and changing technology

December 14, 2010

I haven’t upgraded my television. It works fine and my environmental nature winces whenever I consider trading up for a modern, wide-screen version.

Ever since the digital switch I’ve noticed that my shows are cropped badly. The Daily Show is obviously not framed correctly–I regularly miss meaningful gestures of John Stewart’s left hand. We straight up miss jokes on American Dad and the Family Guy because they occur in that region of the show that only wide-screened TVs include.

The other day, I noticed that we were even missing out on part of Jeopardy. In some shots, two out of three of the contestants were practically cut in half! Read on…

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Don prefers brunettes

July 29, 2010

I’m glad Betty left Don.  Though if this post were about Betty, I would discuss how her very nature (read: attitude towards her kids) will keep her from being happy and loved. Already in the first episode of Season 4 we see Henry Francis slowly realizing how awful she is. I vaguely remember a dream from last night where Betty and I share a glass of wine and she shares with me her revelation: her kids are terrified of her and she hasn’t been a good mother. Perhaps I think too much about Madmen.  But that’s neither here nor there.

No, today I want to talk about how Don prefers brunettes.

Let’s take a look at his lovers:

Bohemian Chick

Brunette.

Not that Don really had feelings for this woman back in Season 1 when she was in the picture.  She was nothing more than a hobby–something to occupy his time and an escape from the pressures of home and work.

Wealthy Jewish Storeowner

Brunette.

Rachel Menken was a departure point for Don.  In Rachel he found an intellectual equal–someone he could confide in and trust.  The first point in his life–I’d wager–that he discovered that he could love and be loved.  The despair he felt when she discovered his desperation (due in part to his lot in life, and in a large part due to his inability to love and accept his wife and family) was profoundly real.

Comedian’s Wife

A redhead.

Following his disastrous affair with Rachel Menken, Don went back to flirting around with the women he met.  The Comedian’s Wife was just that: a woman he met who wanted him and who he could stomach sleeping with.

LA Floozy

Barely blond?  Brunette?

Regardless of hair color, Don found Joy’s free-wheeling sexuality disgusting the way Don was (and is) disgusted by Betty and her, well, Betty-ness.  His sordid experience with her drove him back to the original Mrs. Don Draper, in attempt to make peace with his past and himself.

School Teacher

Brunette.

Here Don found something. Found someone.  Remember when he left her in the car the night Betty confronted him about his past?  Remember when they spoke the next morning and she asked him if he was alright?  And he said, “Only you would ask me that.”  Only her.  I’m surprised and disappointed not to meet her again in the first episode of Season 4.

Instead we find Don flirting around again, and with a blond–bound and determined not to learn from his love patterns of the first three seasons as we have and destined to repeat his mistakes all over again.

Infatuation is not love, Don.  Infatuation is not love.  And infatuation seems to be what you find in blonds.  That’s why you never loved Betty.  The infatuation wore off, and you were left with a level of commitment and pressure that made you uncomfortable and unreliable.

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The Santa Rosa Cocktail!

July 23, 2010

To celebrate the weekend and the return of Madmen this Sunday, I would like to share my boyfriend Will’s most recent cocktail creation: The Santa Rosa.

The back story:

We watched Madmen as a marathon last winter, having only discovered it when my mother introduced me to it on a family trip.  For a month, we did nothing else but watch Madmen.  We were intrigued by Don’s usual drink: the Old Fashioned, and also by Betty Draper’s Gimlet and the martinis that the Fat Cats on the show have during their decadent three-martini lunches.  Also, the casseroles, but we quickly discovered that casseroles contain a lot of cheese and let that phase go by without too much hubbub.  The cocktail obsession, however, stuck with us, and Will started rapidly acquiring the sundry liquors, elixers and various bitters needed to try anything and everything, with an emphasis on the cocktails from the days of yore.

Will quickly tired of other people’s recipes and started to experiment in mixology, sometimes with disastrous results.  The Santa Rosa is his first cocktail creation that’s ready for prime time (though he also has come up with his own interesting twists on some of the classics!).

Shake or stir the following and serve on ice in an old-fashioned glass.  The garnish of a sprig of cilantro adds a wonderful complexity and tingles your taste buds.

  • 1 1/2 oz bourbon
  • 1 1/2 oz fresh-squeezed grapefruit juice
  • 1/8 oz Benedictine
  • 1/8 oz sweet vermouth
  • 1/8 oz grenadine
  • 1 dash Angostura bitters if you have the large bottle, 2 dashes if dealing with the small bottle

The 1/8 oz is pretty hard to measure–most recipes would just call it “one dash” to avoid stressing you out. Don’t sweat it if your measure is a little off.

How Will created it:

The Santa Rosa began as a way to get rid of some quickly aging but still good grapefruit.  Bourbon was a natural choice for the liquor pairing because they both have such strong favors.  He considered adding simple syrup to sweeten it (grapefruit is very sour), but dismissed this option as obvious and boring.

Instead he added a little Benedictine–a very strong, complex liqueur. The drink tasted better, but still a little sour and astringent.  Will added Angostura bitters, comme il faut (because that’s what you do). He added grenadine, and the drink was no longer sour, and had a lovely red color.  But still there lingered the astringent bourbon finish!

He thought long and hard about what would make it smoother, and decided that sweet vermouth would be good for that.  He added a little bit, and liked the result… a lot!

Note:  In a pinch, Drambuie could be substituted for Benedictine.  They cost about the same (about $30 a bottle), but Benedictine is hard to find.
Also note:  Many of these ingredients–in fact all of these ingredients, will be consumed at a very slow pace.  You may balk at the initial investment, but we find we get a lot of joy in sharing our varied cocktail menu with guests (and our taste buds!) and you may too.

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The Adventures of Clumpy

July 12, 2010

You may not know this about me, but I am a huge fan of Days of Our Lives. I’ve watched the show since I was in high school, and am lucky to have witnessed Marlena’s head spinning and projectile vomiting a la The Exorcist when she was possessed by the devil, numerous serial killers and that time that Jack and Jennifer pushed some guy in that vat of acid (not really clear on the details there). According to my high school boyfriend, there was a time that I gave up Days of Our Lives (!!!) but I have no memory of that.

Somewhere along the line, my father started subscribing to Soap Opera Digest for me (I think he gets them for free), which is an excellent addition to my life. It is because of this excellent addition to my life that I have this awesome gem to share with you:

You're going to want to click on this to study it more closely. Seriously.

Yes, this cat that looks like a long-haired version of the Guster is staring at a giant litter scooper in the sky. Yes, the giant litter scooper in the sky is holding a purple blob that looks like a hybrid of Meatwad and a Teletubbie giving us what might be a thumbs up.

If that cat were anything like the Guster instead of just looking a little like him, he would have run screaming. He also wouldn’t even be on the moon because he’s not really allowed outside of house, even though he’s been embarking on a few sordid outside adventures of late (part one, part two).

Yet, here this cat is, staring–seemingly in awe–at this scooper and scoop-character (I think we’re supposed to believe his name is Clumpy) in the sky.

Lots of ads are weird and random so let’s forgive this part. It turns out if you look at the lower right hand corner, this is not an ad for a movie that no one in their right minds would want to see, but an ad for Scoop Away brand cat litter. OK, it’s an ad for cat litter.

Have you ever seen a cat poop? I think that most of us have, and for those of us who haven’t, it’s a lot like a little dog poop, which is somewhat like a little human poop. It looks nothing like Meatwad, and only nominally like a Teletubbie. They are not purple, they do not have eyes, and they are not shaped like a biscuit. Is this ad telling us that if we use the Scoop Away brand cat litter (which, btw, is terrible and horrible for the environment, though nothing compared to the BP oil spill), our cat’s poops will turn into little purple biscuit-shaped poops and fly away into space? Cause that would be pretty awesome, but a rather bitter pill to swallow, if you know what I mean (or if I even know what I mean, which is that it would be hard to swallow).

It turns out, if you visit www.scoopaway.com, as this ad urges you to, there are indeed movies–almost adventures–starring Clumpy. They all have the same general story line–Clumpy stays together while his counterpart falls apart, be it while lifting weights at the gym (while flirting–mind you–with a yellow clump of cat poo), catching rays at the beach or scaling the Alps. OK, Scoop Away brand cat litter, you got me to look at your website. I stared, transfixed in horror, at these elaborate scenes you probably hope will go viral and somehow increase your hold on the demographic of soap-opera-watching-cat-loving women who all share the same general distaste for litter box cleaning. You win.  I’m even helping you by drawing attention on the Internets to your misguided attempt at viral marketing.  But be warned:  I predict a class action lawsuit on behalf of American housewives and other soap opera addicts who will soon find themselves haunted by these smiling purple cat poops in the sky.

to my readers: a contest

May 2, 2005

Please help me.

1.I am in dire need of a title to a soap opera.
2.I still sleep on the living room floor.
3.My confidence is shaken.

Let’s address these points in reverse order.

3.My confidence is shaken.

Honestly, I don’t know what you can do about this. Let’s move on, but have it be acknowledged. You can even feel sorry for me a little bit if you like.

2.I still sleep on the living room floor.

Now, I know that I was the cheap one that wanted to live, well…cheaply. But I’m over it. What makes matters worse is that I’m an absolute germaphobe. Really. And this is not a clean living room floor. Many of you have stepped exactly where I sleep with all sorts of BART residue, excrement, what-have-you on your shoes. How do you think that makes me feel when I awake during the night to realize I’ve rolled off my foot-wide camping mat? Well, quite paranoid, actually.

1.I am in dire need of a title to a soap opera. Now this is important.

I have been searching the world for a title to a soap opera, with no luck. As a result, I’m turning to you, my readers, capricious as you may be.

So, anyway, a good soap opera title. It needs to be catchy, and have a good acronym (like DOOL). Plus extra points for being norCal relevant. Submissions will be judged by a committee of fifteen. If you’d like to sit on this committee, let me know.

What do you get out of it?! I’ll put your name somewhere someplace mixed into my top secret project. Next to the produce section of the supermarket. There your name will be: in large captial letters. Title by ______ (insert your name). That could be you! Or your name, anyway.

Participation is NOT optional. Post suggestions as comments on this post. And please remember that I have an invisible stat counter, so I know:

a.) what IP address you’re coming from. Not only does that IP address uniquely identify the computer at which you sit, but I also get a map of the world with a little red dot pointing out exactly where you are.

b.) how many returning visitors that I get. I can compare this number to the number of comments posted on this post, and easily conclude who has and has not posted a suggestion. So, if you’re thinking about skirting this particular duty, know that I’ll track you down. I have already. I know, it’s freaky. But, really, I don’t have much to do. I’m actually really terrified of this blogging habit I’ve developed. I don’t know what’s going to happen when I get a job where I actually have to work.

And you don’t even have to leave my your name! It’s totally fine with me if right by the eggplants, the sign reads:

TITLE BY ANONYMOUS


Or you can reclaim it later. I’m flexible. I might demand proof though, so you might plan ahead.

Oh, and I added a link to the right that says “friends&siblings.” If you want to be a friend/sibling, just let me know. I’ll link to any profile be it myspace, Russian bride, lesbos-for-peace, whatever.

(If Meatwad doesn’t have a friendster profile, such would be a gross, gross oversight on the part of the younger generation, don’t you agree?)