is that maybe your dreams change almost daily.
Each dream might take just about everything out of you.
And then you start wondering…
was it that missed opportunity that was my golden ticket?
Is it this one? or that one?
Plan A, Plan B, or Plan C?
And why are there so many damn plans anyway??
This is my life.
I don’t like Andy anymore. Now I like Steve. Cool. He’s cute, popular. I was about to say he’s smart. Well he might be. I hope he doesn’t do to me what he did to Sarah T. He asked her out and a couple minutes later he dumped her.
For my birthday I’m getting a phone. Then Becky’s phone can be given to Erica! I think I’ll get the Swatch Twin Phone. It’s cool but its $97! I don’t think Mom and Dad are going to spring for it. Unless we get the money. And then were moving to Arkansas. Blech! Hell! Read on…
The Guster was really, really great in our movie Hanging with the Gus Man. What? You haven’t seen it?? Watch it now; you won’t be sorry. Seen it? Watch it again! It’s so brilliant*.
He popped up right when we needed him too. A little bit of cat treat on my fingers was all I needed to get him to approach at just the right moment.
All in all, it was an amazing filming experience.
So, I said to Will the other day, “Let’s hitch our wagons to this star. We’ll become cat handlers, move to LA. Get Gus an agent. It’s our destiny.” What could be wrong with this idea?
I was inexplicably invited to this event called Swagapolooza last Tuesday evening. Attendance was strictly limited to tweeters and “digital influencers” from San Francisco.
Flattery will get you a long way with me, as it did when I received the invitation only a week before the event. I assumed that they hadn’t gotten enough RSVPs and started scraping nearer the bottom of the barrel of local bloggers and tweeters. Or maybe I have more reach on the Internet then I think I do.
Regardless, I showed up at 7 to get my two free drinks and see if I couldn’t make a new friend. I was lucky to have gotten to stop by my great friend Corrie’s birthday party just a block or two from the event. There her partner Ed gave me the idea that at an event called something like Swagapalooza, one might leave with an iPad.
An iPad! I’m too cheap to buy one, but it would sure be a great addition to our upcoming European adventure (as well as every moment of my life). Maybe that night was the night?
I reflected on this as I waited for my turn at the bar and checked out the grub they were serving. Crappy rolled sandwiches I know from attending far too many networking events and pizza. I was glad I had eaten.
I asked the bartender what was included for my red ticket, and was shocked to discover I could have anything I wanted! I searched the bottles. ”Anything?” I asked. He nodded. I noted that this event was heavily sponsored and that I should return as I ordered a Sapphire and Tonic. Read on…
Once upon a time I lived with my sister Alexandra in an apartment building in the shape of a dome.
See??? You didn't believe me, but it's actually a dome. Google street view sure does come through in a pinch.
She was just coming back to the Bay Area from living in a cooperative warehouse space in Brooklyn. It was a cool space; though haunted. The ghosts danced away in the air above human heads all the way up the 40 foot ceilings just like in Magnetic Fields’ song Busby Berkeley Dreams. Read on…
The other night we enjoyed The Late Show, the 1977 movie starring Lily Tomlin, Art Carney and Bill Macy.
Bill Macy plays Charles Hatter, a down-on-his-luck entrepreneur. We first meet him leaving his office, and catch the following glorious screen shot:
Five businesses all named after himself, all with the same address but various specialties? I love it. Hey, if you have a skill, why not make a business out of it on the off chance you succeed?
He reminds me of me. Had Charles Hatter hired me as a marketing consultant, though, I would have told him that if he wanted to list all his various enterprises in the lobby directory, he should definitely not name them all after himself. Each business should have its own unique vibrant identity so that they seemingly stand on their own. Naming them all after himself sends an almost desperate message–hire me to do anything! I can do anything! Read on…
Over the course of last year Will and I began experimenting and really appreciating how good a cocktail can be. Before then, we had basically subsisted on scotch on ice, beer, and gin and vodka tonics. And food, of course.
All of a sudden our eyes were opened to a whole new world of drinks! Will began to play with different ingredients and soon had invented his first custom cocktail, the Santa Rosa. And he sure has the touch. Even without booze, he can whip up a great drink. He makes awesome sodas during the day out of some combination of soda water, grenadine or simple syrup and various types of bitters. Yum! Read on…
I had this idea a couple years ago when Evite first started getting annoying. Is it still annoying? I haven’t used it in years but I remember it being exceedingly frustrating to use.
My idea was for an event invitation site called ESPvite.com. Enter your event details and guest list (no need for email addresses!) and POOF! ESPVITE would invite your guests via ESP.
ESP, or extrasensory perception, you remember, is the act of receiving information not through physical senses but through your mind. Read on…
My January first came with an awesome sense of renewal. I was surprised because I have spent hours convincing myself that the year end is purely arbitrary and that I should treat every day as a fresh start (if one is needed). But I can’t deny the freshness I felt on January 1st and the hope that this year would hold even more awesomeness than those previous.
I am someone who has a lot of projects. I asked a new friend at a party over the holidays, “What are you constantly obsessed with?” Julia pointed out that that is a weird question. Other people may not have constant obsessions, projects dominating their brain. I have to wonder how that feels. Maybe a little calmer. Read on…
As a small business owner, I am honored to receive email sales pitches for advertising placement, marketing and promotion help, and, in this case, the “Talk of the Town 2010 Plaque of Honor for Excellence in Customer Satisfaction.”
As someone perpetually obsessed with both get rich quick and get rich slow schemes, one of my favorite activities is getting to the bottom of what’s in it for these services.
“Talk of the Town” would have you believe that they evaluate all businesses and that yours came out on top. They interviewed my customers and they love me. The first time I received one of their emails, I was honored.
When you click through from the emails, you find that to showcase this honor, you need to shell out at least $195. An award you pay for? What a deal!
I especially enjoy this quote from their website:
What does the recognition mean to me and my business?
To a business it means everything. It reflects your customer’s opinion of your business and drives new business referrals. You can leverage this award to thank customers, staff and returning and new business development.
In other words, this recognition means nothing, but we’re really good at stringing fluffy sounding words together so that you feel good about what you do and want to give us money.
The funniest part to me is that someone took the time to put this elaborate scheme together. I have nothing but the most profound respect for what motivates con men, but am continually bewildered by their constant dismissal of whatever moral compass they have inside.
They do look like nice plaques, though. Maybe I’ll ask for mine for Christmas.
Money Saving Tip for 2012: Keep Wearing those Torn Jeans
@almostevrything thanks Karen :)!
Thurs. 1-6-93
@dammitdana right?! Cause it's that easy... einie meenie minie mo. Let's get married!
Thurs. 1-6-93
@jennifer_heller I am loving the cavalier "choosing" to Like someone. :)
12/20/93
@ladybarberbrown yeah @mlhinca what gives??!! #retribution
12/20/93
@jennifer_heller I'm going to have to speak to Marion about this. #childneglect
