I’m seriously confused. I posted this on Facebook and Al (who I find to be a reliable and informed source for tech news) said that a TV was as a good a surface as any for a QR code.
So, really, here in this Duncan Hines commercial, when all the cupcakes turn into a QR code, we’re going to pause our DVR and take a photo with our smart phone?
Really?
I think the Japanese have it right. Put QR codes on stuff like headstones where it’s stationary. Duh.
We stopped on by Urban Ore last weekend in West Berkeley.
I’ve had a bee in my bonnet for awhile now to make coasters out of our stack of lotto tickets. How cute would that be?
I was looking for some used tiles to paste them on before coating them in epoxy. No luck, but we did find this awesome scene. That poor brontosaurus. Aren’t you jealous (like I am) of the fun they must have working at Urban Ore?
Somehow we managed to write the best Craigslist ad ever. Or maybe it’s just the time of year. Joey says that people move a lot in November because of Mercury being in retrograde or something.
Regardless, we have had an overwhelming response to our ad. I’ve filled the available room twice and never had this experience. Every other time there was a clear winner — the lesser of the evils. This time, I love everyone. I want to live with everyone. They are all so intriguing and so chill.
Living in the SF Bay. So many cool people. Most of the time it’s a blessing but today it’s a curse. Wondering what the best roommate wanted ad is? Read on…
I carved a fantastic cocktail glass (GLOAT!) in a pumpkin the day before Halloween. That was a Sunday. I put it on a shelf in my kitchen, and could not wait to display it at our Lushes in Love Cocktail Lounge Salon that coming Friday. Could not wait.
Friday came. My house guest and great friend Jen E. called me while I was out running errands. “The pumpkin is rotted!” she proclaimed. “And there are flies everywhere!!”
“But it’s for tonight!! OH NO!” I was perplexed. I hate flies, but I loved my pumpkin.
“It has to go outside.” She was not going to budge. I growled into the phone for a little bit and then finally agreed.
Thank god I did. It’s five days later and we’re still battling the flies everywhere.
GROSS. No wonder people normally keep them outside. I’m an idiot, right?
My old friend Jeremy got a bee in his bonnet to have a talk show. At first I was super jealous. After all, it was just over a year ago when I went through a disastrous dry run holding my own live talk show. I had to put off my dreams of producing my own talk show. Who was I to object to Jeremy following his?
Especially when he invited Will and I to be guests for Cocktail Corner with the Lushes in Love.
His set was amazing. His guests were amazing — hilarious and educational. And at the end, the whole audience shared a round of Oakland, by the Goodtime Washboard Three. Read on…
Last Friday I held a cocktail party. It went pretty well.
It seems I neglected to replace the soap in the soap dish.
It was so small you could hardly use it!! Dammit. I’m sorry, guests.
p.s. Incidentally, this is not the first post I’ve mentioned my soap dish in. Whaddya think? More posts about benign shit like soap dishes? ???
My dad really stole the show:
I received a stuffed envelope addressed to “MS. Jenniffer Heller” in the mail last week. Ms. Jenniffer Heller of “Artsy Greek Designs.”
OK, so it’s a promotional letter from some people who managed to get both the spelling of my first name and the name of my company wrong. It’s not the first time it’s happened, though it is the first time I’ve caught wind of “Artsy Greek.” Normally it’s “Artsy Geeky” or some such.
I open up the package and double over with laughter.
“Dear Ms. Heller,”
Yes! They got that part right!
“Surprised to see the Artsy Greek Designs name on the enclosed Regatta Horizons Duo Diary sample? Looks impressive, does it?”
I inspected the sample more closely.
Wait, that's not our name or our phone number!
I was definitely impressed. The letter went on…
“Why just send a pocket calendar when you can make a really big impression? The Duo Diary is two gifts in one – a pocket calendar and notepad.”
The question they didn’t address that’s worth asking…why send a pocket calendar at all??
But, you know, these pocket calendars are printed with erroneous information in gold. I do like gold.
I received this letter dated "August 2011" with its limited time offer in October.
Only $1.99 each?? What a steal. What do you think? Essential tax-deductible purchase or the most essential tax-deductible purchase ever??
Like, immediately.
Thanks to long-time reader Gabe for sending me the link to this awesome exploration of the name Heller in print over the years put together by fellow blogger and long-lost-relative Steven Heller.
Bien news. For Alexis. Ana liked Jeff M. and so did Alexis. Now Jeff and Alexis are going out! And I got to ask him out for her. My social life is whack though. Nothing’s ever going to happen. Emily thinks Mike H. and I make a cute couple. I remember when he stole my inhaler and broke my pig pen. He paid $5 for the pen. The point is he might have used to like me. Emily keeps bringing the entry for 10-8. I can’t like him though. We’re just friends.
I doubt anything’s going to happen at the Halloween Dance. It’ll probably end up like the last one, my crying all through the evening.
Ana is really upset that Alexis and Jeff are going together. She was crying at lunch. I’m so happy! She deserves it.
I'm ashamed by how awful I was. Girls can be so mean.
I really hate Daniele. I mean she’s nice and all, but ever since the last dance, I haven’t been friends w/ her. She said, “Hey, Jen it’s no fun if you’re not dancing!” I know she didn’t mean to be mean, but it made me cry harder (after the dance). How is she supposed to know what I feel like? She has every guy in the school around her little finger.
Money Saving Tip for 2012: Keep Wearing those Torn Jeans
@almostevrything thanks Karen :)!
Thurs. 1-6-93
@dammitdana right?! Cause it's that easy... einie meenie minie mo. Let's get married!
Thurs. 1-6-93
@jennifer_heller I am loving the cavalier "choosing" to Like someone. :)
12/20/93
@ladybarberbrown yeah @mlhinca what gives??!! #retribution
12/20/93
@jennifer_heller I'm going to have to speak to Marion about this. #childneglect
